Saturday, April 25, 2015

The other side of the coin

  Alright, so a few years ago I started to really delve into the big wide world of adoption.  I made lots of Facebook friends and started following lots of adoption journeys, both before, during, and post "Gotcha!"  About 6 months in to our commitment to adopt a child with severe neglect and obvious physical needs I started reading all of these blog posts about families who had adopted once, twice, three times or more... These families brought home children from the US, children from foster care, children from orphanages, and some from mental institutions.  They homeschooled their children, some of them cloth diapered, and they would post pictures of a humble home that was essentially spotless. I would sit back at the end of the day, look around my 1500 square foot house that we were renting for our family of 5 and think about the all of the laundry that did NOT get done, do the second or third vinegar rinse of MY cloth diapers for the day, and just wonder HOW?! How on earth do these people do it...and with 3 times as many kids as I have!  
  Well, let me fast forward to today.  We are renting a larger house, but yes - still renting.  I actually, miracle of all miracles, only have one load of laundry left and it is just going through the spin cycle, and my house is clean! (Well, my NEW version of clean)  My daughter is only a week behind where I want her to be in Math, everyone is fed, diapered, bathed, massaged, and have had their second round of range of motion exercises for the day.  I am sitting here with my make up on, hair done, and... yes, still in my pajamas. (It's 3:25 on a Saturday afternoon :/)


I don't generally stop and take pictures of me shampooing pee out of the carpet, or one of my kids after they threw up all over. I didn't take a picture of the FIRST bath where someone pooped in the tub right after I finished washing their hair (we'll call that a practice round), and I certainly didn't announce on Facebook that I had a temper tantrum and grounded one of my kids. Why not? Because that's not the side I want YOU to see!  I want you to be on my side and think only good things of me and my kids and my family.  I want you to see rainbows and sunshine...not the clouds and the storms that come first.

Sooo...why am I doing exactly that right now?  BECAUSE YOU NEED TO KNOW! 6 months after your beautiful child comes home, everyone will be busy living THEIR lives, YOU will be living yours and there will be lots of rainy days...days without umbrellas, days without someone patting you on the back or gushing over your beautiful child who may never walk.  You will not have 500 facebook friends offering to sit on your couch for you while your child screams for the second hour in a row for reasons even he does not understand.  You will realize that you probably aren't going to be invited to the same things you used to be because it's just not as "easy" to have your family over to someone else's house.

I LOVE my life, I ADORE my family, I wouldn't change one minute.  They are my life, they are amazing, smart, creative, precious, maddening, frustrating, mess-making.  They are BEAUTIFUL.  This is the other side of all of those makeovers...yes! They have grown. Yes! They have made incredible improvements. Yes! I LOVE them and at the end of the day, I will not have a perfectly clean house, the laundry will never be ironed, the garage will smell of dirty diapers, and their may be dirty dishes in the sink.  I WILL get up the next day and do it all over again and thank God for giving me this life. 


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